One hundred easy ways to lose a man lyrics

Artist  : Bernstein leonard 
Song : One hundred easy ways to lose a man
 
Betty Comden and Adolph Green
music by Leonard Bernstein

RUTH


NOW THE FIRST WAY TO LOSE A MAN --

YOUÆVE MET A CHARMING FELLOW AND YOUÆRE OUT FOR A
SPIN.
THE MOTOR FAILS AND HE JUST WEARS A HELPLESS
GRIN,
DONÆT BAT YOUR EYES AND SAY, ôWHAT A ROMANTIC
SPOT WEÆRE IN.ö

Just get out, crawl under the car, tell him itÆs
the gasket and fix it in two seconds flat with a
bobby pin.

THATÆS A GOOD WAY TO LOSE A MAN.

HE TAKES YOU TO A BASEBALL GAME,
YOU SIT KNEE TO KNEE.
HE SAYS, ôTHE NEXT MAN UP AT BAT WILL BUNT,
YOUÆLL SEE.ö
DONÆT SAY, ôOOOH, WHATÆS A BUNT? THIS GAMEÆS TOO
HARD FOR LITTLE ME.ö

Just say, ôBunt? Are you nuts?!! With no outs,
two men on base, and a left-handed batter coming
up, youÆll walk right into a triple play just
like it happened in the fifth game of the World
Series in 1923.ö

THATÆS A SURE WAY TO LOSE A MAN.

A SURE SURE SURE SURE WAY TO LOSE A MAN,
A SPLENDID WAY TO LOSE A MAN.

JUST THROW YOUR KNOWLEDGE IN HIS FACE,
HEÆLL NEVER TRY FOR SECOND BASE.
Ninety-eight ways to go.

THE THIRD WAY TO LOSE A MAN --
THE LIFE-GUARD AT THE BEACH THAT ALL THE GIRLIES
ADORE
SWIMS BRAVELY OUT TO SAVE YOU THROUGH THE OCEANÆS
ROAR,
DONÆT SAY, ôOH, THANKS, I WOULD HAVE DROWNED IN
JUST ONE SECOND MORE.ö

Just push his head under water and yell, ôLast
one in is a rotten eggö and race him back to
shore!

THATÆS A SWELL WAY TO LOSE A MAN.

YOUÆVE FOUND YOUR PERFECT MATE AND ITÆS BEEN LOVE
FROM THE START.
HE WHISPERS, ôYOUÆRE THE ONE TO WHO I GIVE MY
HEART.ö
DONÆT SAY, ôI LOVE YOU TOO, MY DEAR, LETÆS NEVER
NEVER PART.ö

Just say, ôIÆm afraid youÆve made a grammatical
error -- itÆs not æTo who I give my heart,Æ it's
æTo whom I give my heartÆ -- You see, with the
use of the preposition æto,Æ æwhoÆ becomes the
indirect object, making the use of æwhomÆ
imperative which I can easily show you by drawing
a simple chartö --

THATÆS A FINE WAY TO LOSE A MAN.

A FINE FINE FINE FINE WAY TO LOSE A MAN,
A DANDY WAY TO LOSE A MAN.

JUST BE MORE WELL-INFORMED THAN HE,
YOUÆLL NEVER HEAR ôO, PROMISE ME.ö

JUST SHOW HIM WHERE HIS GRAMMAR ERRS,
THEN MARK YOUR TOWELS ôHERSö AND ôHERS.ö

YES, GIRLS, YOU TOO CAN LOSE YOUR MAN,
IF YOU WILL USE RUTH SHERWOODÆS PLAN:
ONE HUNDRED EASY WAYS TO LOSE A MAN!