Mr Popiel lyrics

Artist  : Yankovic Weird Al 
Song : Mr Popiel
 
I need a Vegematic!
I need a Pocket
Fisherman!
I need a handy appliance
That'll
scramble an egg while it's still inside its
shell!
(Operators are standing by.
How does
that make you feel?)
Help me.
Mr.
Popiel!
I wanna shine some pennies!
I wanna
mend some leather!
I wanna Krazy-Glue my head
to the bottom of a big steel girder!
(Please,
no C.O.D.'s.
Don't miss out on this
deal.)
Ah, help me.
Mr. Popiel!
Help
me.
Mr. Popiel!
Mr. Popiel!
Mr.
Popiel!
(Wo-o, wo-o.  Ohhhhhh.)
It slices. 
It dices.
Look at that tomato!
You could
even cut a tin can with it,
But you wouldn't
want to!
Mr. Popiel, I'm in trouble.
Need
your assistance on the double.
Oh no!  Now how
am I gonna make
My old vinyl car top look like
new?
Mr. Popiel!
Tell me, what am I s'posed
to do?
Mr. Popiel!
Mr. Popiel!
(Now how
much would you pay?)
But wait, there's
more!
It's not sold in any store!
(Now how
much would you pay?)
Don't answer yet,
Just
look what else you get!
(Now how much would you
pay?)
If you order today,
You get a Ginsu
knife and a smokeless Ashtray!
(Now how much
would you pay?)
Now how much would you
pay?
Mr. Popiel, Mr. Popiel.
Mr. Popiel,
Mr. Popiel.
Mr. Popiel, Mr. Popiel.
Mr.
Popiel, Mr. Popiel.
Make me buy a Garden
Weasel!
Make me buy a Bamboo Steamer!
Make
me take advantage
Of this amazing TV
offer!
(Call our toll-free number,
We'll
make you such a deal.)
Aw, help me!
Mr.
Popiel.  I want it!
(Mr. Popiel.)  Well, I
need it!
(Mr. Popiel.)  I got to got to got to
have it!
Mr. Popiel!
Mr. Popiel!
Hey!